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Ahoi.
I'm not in the mood for some fancy speech. Enjoy reading and tell me what you think or don't enjoy reading and tell me anyway.
I'm not in the mood for some fancy speech. Enjoy reading and tell me what you think or don't enjoy reading and tell me anyway.
Mature
© 2013 - 2024 Lorol
Comments33
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I think this is very unique and well-thought out. The struggles of your main character, and the way he reacts to the struggles, are consistent and heart-felt.
I do have one suggestion! In the first paragraph that you have italicized, it seems that you used the phrase 'the man' a few too many times. I think if you replace one or two usages with 'him' or 'he' the paragraph would flow better.
Only a suggestion! Thank you for submitting this wonderful work I really enjoyed reading it!